Note to people with no sense of humor: This blog post is a joke!
In Quaker Worship, there are a couple of guidelines you should follow in order to discern whether what you are considering saying should be shared with the people you are with. It is fortunate that they are very simple and easy to remember. I discerned these guidelines today after reading one prominent Quaker's facebook status, which said : "(name) should not be on facebook during business meeting."
Guideline 1: The message should come from God.
Guideline 2: The message should be un-boring enough that people don't quit listening and go check facebook.
I encourage you to speak during a Quaker meeting for worship, or a Quaker meeting-for-worship-for-business if (and only if) what you have to say follows both of those guidelines.
Friday, June 12, 2009
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Sharing Your Experience, Skills, and Abilities
"You will say Christ says this, and the New York Times says this, and National Public Radio says that, but what can you say?"
I was at the celebration of new book, Fit for Freedom, Not for Friendship, and one of the most striking insights shared at that celebration about the relationship between Quakers and African Americans or other people of color was, "many Quakers have been willing to have people of color be around them, but they have not been willing to change anything about themselves or their ways of doing things in order to make people of color welcome."
Quakers are struggling with ways of ensuring that people younger than age 40, people of color, and in general people who are somehow outside of the Quaker norm will participate in Quaker communities. (As compared to the population as a whole, Quakers in the USA are much more likely to be Caucasian, come from a family with far above average income, and be much older than the general population.)
Willingness (or lack thereof) to change and respond in order to fully welcome people who are different into our communities will play a big part in changing this.
Another factor in this challenge Quakers face is one that might not be intuitive at first. We as Quakers need to ask ourselves not only, "what can I do to accomodate and welcome people who are different into our community", but "what can they do for us?"
Part of what young people, people of color, and all of our other visitors are looking for is a community where the things they can contribute are not only treated with respect, but treated as something truly needed and wanted by the community. It's okay to tell us that some of our contributions to the community are not helpful, but that needs to be balanced with help and encouragement in making contributions that are helpful.
I was at the celebration of new book, Fit for Freedom, Not for Friendship, and one of the most striking insights shared at that celebration about the relationship between Quakers and African Americans or other people of color was, "many Quakers have been willing to have people of color be around them, but they have not been willing to change anything about themselves or their ways of doing things in order to make people of color welcome."
Quakers are struggling with ways of ensuring that people younger than age 40, people of color, and in general people who are somehow outside of the Quaker norm will participate in Quaker communities. (As compared to the population as a whole, Quakers in the USA are much more likely to be Caucasian, come from a family with far above average income, and be much older than the general population.)
Willingness (or lack thereof) to change and respond in order to fully welcome people who are different into our communities will play a big part in changing this.
Another factor in this challenge Quakers face is one that might not be intuitive at first. We as Quakers need to ask ourselves not only, "what can I do to accomodate and welcome people who are different into our community", but "what can they do for us?"
Part of what young people, people of color, and all of our other visitors are looking for is a community where the things they can contribute are not only treated with respect, but treated as something truly needed and wanted by the community. It's okay to tell us that some of our contributions to the community are not helpful, but that needs to be balanced with help and encouragement in making contributions that are helpful.
Friday, January 16, 2009
Quakers, Enthusiasm, Youth, and Money
A couple people have mentioned that a lot of the money needed to keep our Quaker organizations afloat is coming from elderly quakers, and not so much from young adults. Some ask, "How can we get our young adults to give money?"
Looking at the behavior of today's Quakers, another question comes to my mind. How can we create Quaker communities our young adults, and everyone else, will care deeply about? For a lot of people, the experience of being with Quakers today does not inspire intense devotion, powerful spiritually enriching experiences, etc. If it did, I would not be able to go to a meeting with over 100 members and hear that it was a good day when 29 people show up for meeting for worship (not all of them members). Is there anything we can do to make meeting for worship better for ourselves? Is there anything YOU can do to make Quaker meeting for worship a deeper spiritual experience for yourself and others? A good number of Quakers do feel compelled to spend upwards of 5 hours per week participating in our communities in one way or another. If we can get more people to have this greater connection to Quakers, the money problems will sort themselves out.
One Quaker mentioned to me that one successful way to fund-raise is to treat the "thank-you" as the most important thing.
What is it that young adults offer us that we are thankful for?
What is it about Quaker communities that we're thankful for?
Can we present those things that we're thankful for in a way that helps other people seek & find them?
A Friend once shared a message that went more or less like this: Our job is to build a community so vital and filled with joy and spirit... that when we ask people to give money, they, being good, skeptical Quakers, will think "why should i?" And then they'll think to themselves that the answer is obvious, and that answer will be in the benefits and support and deep spirituality that our community offers.
This last is a message that, to me, felt truly spirit-led. I have felt something of a call to see that this message gets the follow-through that is due to it.
This is not just the work of the person who spoke those words, but the work of everyone who wants the vitality and beauty of the Quaker faith to thrive.
Looking at the behavior of today's Quakers, another question comes to my mind. How can we create Quaker communities our young adults, and everyone else, will care deeply about? For a lot of people, the experience of being with Quakers today does not inspire intense devotion, powerful spiritually enriching experiences, etc. If it did, I would not be able to go to a meeting with over 100 members and hear that it was a good day when 29 people show up for meeting for worship (not all of them members). Is there anything we can do to make meeting for worship better for ourselves? Is there anything YOU can do to make Quaker meeting for worship a deeper spiritual experience for yourself and others? A good number of Quakers do feel compelled to spend upwards of 5 hours per week participating in our communities in one way or another. If we can get more people to have this greater connection to Quakers, the money problems will sort themselves out.
One Quaker mentioned to me that one successful way to fund-raise is to treat the "thank-you" as the most important thing.
What is it that young adults offer us that we are thankful for?
What is it about Quaker communities that we're thankful for?
Can we present those things that we're thankful for in a way that helps other people seek & find them?
A Friend once shared a message that went more or less like this: Our job is to build a community so vital and filled with joy and spirit... that when we ask people to give money, they, being good, skeptical Quakers, will think "why should i?" And then they'll think to themselves that the answer is obvious, and that answer will be in the benefits and support and deep spirituality that our community offers.
This last is a message that, to me, felt truly spirit-led. I have felt something of a call to see that this message gets the follow-through that is due to it.
This is not just the work of the person who spoke those words, but the work of everyone who wants the vitality and beauty of the Quaker faith to thrive.
Ministry and Obligation
Ministry :The act of ministering; ministration; service. "With tender ministry."
Ministration : relief: assistance in time of difficulty; "the contributions provided some relief for the victims"
When a person sees a situation that is in need of some improvement, and feels she or he might be the person most able to help, maybe he or she should feel an obligation. I'd say this applies to ministry in Meeting for Worship, other sorts of ministry, and things that are usually not thought of as ministry.
From an old Quaker book about how to live as a Quaker*: (language changed slightly to make it clearer)
"Each local Meeting should appoint a group of its members to serve as a 'Meeting on Worship and Ministry' whose function is to give continuing thought to the religious life of the meeting and its individual members and attenders.... They should encourage others to be ready when the call comes to speak or pray during worship, as a minister.
"... There is a responsibility to give sympathetic encouragement to those who show promising gifts, and to give loving guidance to those whose ministry is not helpful. There's also a responsibility to open the way for those who are timid and young in the ministry.
"... From its earliest days, the community of Quakers has emphasized the importance to the human Community of a living ministry, freely given in the service of God and man..."
"... it is urged that all Friends, whether recorded ministers or not, continually feel their responsibility for the meeting for worship."
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Communities of Quakers in Philadelphia
There has been some discussion about the young adult Quakers in Philadelphia and what's going well, and what's not going well.
One thing that's going well is that the young adult community here is a place where we can focus on the fun side of being with a Quaker community. We enjoy each other's company, we meet folks with similar interests and values, and of course we conduct the all-important teaming up of our forces to eat good food.
Whatever we want, it's up to us to put in the work to make a spiritual community that works for us, fulfills us, or gives us joy. Or as one friend put it: some assembly required... kind of like furniture you get from IKEA.
In Quaker communities, each of us needs to pitch in, if we're going to put together a community that takes care of all of us. Each person should think about what she can do to help the group care for all of its people. Each person also ought to think about what she wants to get out of participating in the community, what kind of nurture or help or friendship or sharing of fun, or whatever, she wants to get from it. Whaddaya like? Whaddaya want more of? Probably good questions to ask in any community.
One thing that's going well is that the young adult community here is a place where we can focus on the fun side of being with a Quaker community. We enjoy each other's company, we meet folks with similar interests and values, and of course we conduct the all-important teaming up of our forces to eat good food.
Whatever we want, it's up to us to put in the work to make a spiritual community that works for us, fulfills us, or gives us joy. Or as one friend put it: some assembly required... kind of like furniture you get from IKEA.
In Quaker communities, each of us needs to pitch in, if we're going to put together a community that takes care of all of us. Each person should think about what she can do to help the group care for all of its people. Each person also ought to think about what she wants to get out of participating in the community, what kind of nurture or help or friendship or sharing of fun, or whatever, she wants to get from it. Whaddaya like? Whaddaya want more of? Probably good questions to ask in any community.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Paying Attention to Gifts
There's an idea that's been floating around among Quakers I know, which is often referred to as "naming a person's gifts".
For whatever reason, I find myself always suspicious of "quakerspeak" - where quakers use a special Quaker term for something when an ordinary word or phrase would do. I guess I like to speak plainly. I find it useful to translate in my head between this phrase, "naming a person's gifts", to something like "paying attention to a person's gifts". I think "gifts" is a bit of a strange word in this context, but here I think it's actually very useful to notice the connection between gifts as in "giving presents" and "this person is gifted / talented".
I received a gift from one friend when he mentioned that focusing on results is often not a good way to become closer to God. More than once, when I was focused on a good idea, this friend's gift to me has been to see the other side of a situation, the side that I had not paid attention to and that was important to understand before moving forward. I am thankful for his ability to share good ideas.
I received a gift from another friend when she welcomed me to Philadelphia by giving me, as a young person who had never had an office job, the chance to get some office experience as an intern with her organization. Finding somewhere for a person to help out, and giving them a chance to "learn by doing" and in turn give something back, is definitely a gift. I am grateful that I got the chance to spend four months doing this internship at the American Friends Service Committee.
For whatever reason, I find myself always suspicious of "quakerspeak" - where quakers use a special Quaker term for something when an ordinary word or phrase would do. I guess I like to speak plainly. I find it useful to translate in my head between this phrase, "naming a person's gifts", to something like "paying attention to a person's gifts". I think "gifts" is a bit of a strange word in this context, but here I think it's actually very useful to notice the connection between gifts as in "giving presents" and "this person is gifted / talented".
I received a gift from one friend when he mentioned that focusing on results is often not a good way to become closer to God. More than once, when I was focused on a good idea, this friend's gift to me has been to see the other side of a situation, the side that I had not paid attention to and that was important to understand before moving forward. I am thankful for his ability to share good ideas.
I received a gift from another friend when she welcomed me to Philadelphia by giving me, as a young person who had never had an office job, the chance to get some office experience as an intern with her organization. Finding somewhere for a person to help out, and giving them a chance to "learn by doing" and in turn give something back, is definitely a gift. I am grateful that I got the chance to spend four months doing this internship at the American Friends Service Committee.
Friday, August 8, 2008
... Quaker Quest
One of the deep strengths of Quaker Quest (QQ) is that it takes the idea of Quakerism as a deeply personal religion and puts it into practice.
One of the central ideas that helped bring Quakerism into being was the idea that each of us has access to the divine light (or, may make communion with God) and that God may speak and act through any of us. This applies to Quakers, folks who are just interested in learning about Quakerism, and everybody else.
Quaker Quest puts this into practice by asking seekers to listen to several different Quakers and to share from their own experience and their own sense of the divine.
Philadelphia Yearly Meeting's Quaker Quest group, which just started recently, decided to plan a day for Quakers to learn about QQ and explore the possibility of running a QQ program at their meeting. The plan originally called for several wonderful and highly respected Quakers to give speeches which, altogether, would take up most of the morning. The question came up, what would it be like to be in the audience listening to these speeches for a few hours? It has been said that God works in mysterious ways. I believe that the divine also sometimes works in ways that are rather mundane and plain. For many people, listening to a priest give a speech for a couple of hours is rather boring, and they get antsy, stop paying attention, get up and leave if there's a chance, maybe forget almost everything that was said. The same thing can happen if it's a few "important" Quakers giving speeches for a couple hours.
At our Quaker Quest (QQ) planning group meeting, we felt it would be wise to give people a chance to actively participate in the session. I think that the fact that the audience might become bored was what brought the idea up, but to me it also served as a reminder that each of the participants has the ability to share something deep and powerfully beneficial to our group, and that making sure they are included at all steps along the way is important. I believe this is true not only at QQ seekers' sessions and at our Friends meetings, but at QQ info sessions for Quakers.
Sometimes god works in profoundly un-spectacular ways.
One of the central ideas that helped bring Quakerism into being was the idea that each of us has access to the divine light (or, may make communion with God) and that God may speak and act through any of us. This applies to Quakers, folks who are just interested in learning about Quakerism, and everybody else.
Quaker Quest puts this into practice by asking seekers to listen to several different Quakers and to share from their own experience and their own sense of the divine.
Philadelphia Yearly Meeting's Quaker Quest group, which just started recently, decided to plan a day for Quakers to learn about QQ and explore the possibility of running a QQ program at their meeting. The plan originally called for several wonderful and highly respected Quakers to give speeches which, altogether, would take up most of the morning. The question came up, what would it be like to be in the audience listening to these speeches for a few hours? It has been said that God works in mysterious ways. I believe that the divine also sometimes works in ways that are rather mundane and plain. For many people, listening to a priest give a speech for a couple of hours is rather boring, and they get antsy, stop paying attention, get up and leave if there's a chance, maybe forget almost everything that was said. The same thing can happen if it's a few "important" Quakers giving speeches for a couple hours.
At our Quaker Quest (QQ) planning group meeting, we felt it would be wise to give people a chance to actively participate in the session. I think that the fact that the audience might become bored was what brought the idea up, but to me it also served as a reminder that each of the participants has the ability to share something deep and powerfully beneficial to our group, and that making sure they are included at all steps along the way is important. I believe this is true not only at QQ seekers' sessions and at our Friends meetings, but at QQ info sessions for Quakers.
Sometimes god works in profoundly un-spectacular ways.
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